Review: Queer Dirty Laundry by Jason Lloyd

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Rating: 2.75 stars out of 5

Queer Dirty Laundry Cover“In this nonfiction coming of age mini memoir, Kevin and Jason embark on an adventure to Philadelphia to visit friends and to get into their normal hijinks. Along their journey, they confide in each other the only way best friends can; through laughter, love and pain. They share stories of coming out, first time sexual experiences and dramatic events that changed their lives forever. This hilarious and heartfelt journey through the past can only strengthen their friendship in the present.”..Jason Lloyd

I used the author’s blurb for his story because, honestly, this book is hard to describe in plot or category.   Fiction?  Non-fiction?  Jason Lloyd himself calls his book “creative non-fiction” so anyone’s guess would be accurate. It features Jason Lloyd taking a car trip with his best friend Kevin, aka” Monkey”, on their way to a weekend reunion of sorts with some old friends.   Jason Lloyd uses their road trip as the framework for a succession of personal remembrances and flashbacks into his childhood and early adult years.

It all starts in the Prologue, 40 Minutes After.  Jason and Kevin are in route and a tractor trailer is coming at them head on.  Jason’s life passes before his eyes and the flashbacks begin to….exactly 40 minutes before.

Not exactly a bad beginning but shortly after we find out that this is all so much smoke as the truck misses them and they are back on track to make their rendezvous in Philadelphia.

My issues with this story started almost immediately with the arrival of Kevin at Jason’s place.  His “brazen steps” announce Kevin’s presence like a “herd of elephants”.  Loud, heavy, right? Then Kevin appears and “prances” and “frolics” over to the refrigerator.  So heavy and assertive have given way to light and airy?   The word choices here are enough to flummox Funk & Wagnalls.  Kevin himself is no picnic.  Is Kevin real?  A character?  A real character?  Not sure exactly.  However, he is prone to calling people the “F” word, he is unshaven, wearing old Christmas pajama bottoms, a dirty t-shirt without sleeves as Kevin typically cuts off the stained, smelly armpits rather than wash them.  Offensive thy name is Kevin.  And this is someone the reader (and Jason) will spend the entire book with.  I found Kevin and his nigh constant verbal spouting of derogatory terms and epithets not only irritating but repulsive.  And you are in the car with him and Jason for 150 pages.

As they motor down the road, a conversation between them will bring up a memory which is followed by a flashback into Jason’s past.  Whether it is childhood bullies and the nickname Troll from grade school or remembrances of his closeted years, each segment seems to pop in and out without much effect or depth.  And those events should make an emotional impact on both the reader as well as Jason but that never comes across.

In additional to a jumpy flow to the narrative, the reader is also offered up such insights into Jason’s thoughts like this one:

“Bi was just a slippery dick before Homoville.”

This is Jason remembering how he told people he was bi because he wasn’t ready to come all the way out of the closet . Jason figured bi was more palatable. And yes, I can almost see the cringing from some that this sentence causes.  Jason is the narrator here of his own life and freedom of speech certainly applies.  But I found this offensive and I am certain others will too.  But this is one of the less derogatory sentences to appear here.  The “F” word is so liberally thrown around that I thought I must have been at a anti LGBTQ march.  How you feel about that will let you know whether this is the book for you.

And all along the way, there are just plain odd sentences strewn here and there.  Jason says at one point “his voice can no longer make a signal only dogs can hear..” Uh, you don’t make a signal with your voice, you make a sound, signals being, of course, a sign or gesture.  Jason also believes in “fate, kismet, and serendipity.”  Hmmm, one of these things are not like the others as the saying goes but Jason Lloyd appears unaware of that fact. Here is the quote:

I have always been a firm believer that everything happens for a reason. That just maybe the stars hold our fate. I would like to believe in fate. Serendipity. Kismet. I guess I am like a sappy Hallmark card in that way.”

Well, I can hear Hallmark shuddering now.  I would like to think a rather large red pencil and a determined editor could have fixed some of these problems but   honestly, I just don’t know.  I hate being the person who rains on a new author’s parade so to speak but I can’t see any way around it here.  If you are a friend or fan of Jason Lloyd’s, then pick up a copy and see if you appear inside.  But for all others, wait for the next book from Jason Lloyd to be released and give this one a  pass.

Sales Links:  Smashwords  Barnes & Noble        All Romance eBooks      Amazon

Cover art by Jason Lloyd.  The picture is unfocused.  Is that intentional or not? I suspect not as the type font for the title and the author’s name is blurry too.  Poor quality control cheapens the entire design.

Book Details:

ebook, 150 pages
Published June 12th 2014 by Ginge Publishing
ISBN139781310649332
edition languageEnglish

Author Spotlight: Jason Lloyd on Queer Dirty Laundry, a Character Interview and More (contest)

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spotlight on booksQueer Dirty Laundry Cover

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Jason Lloyd is here today to talk about his latest release, Queer Dirty Laundry!  Jason is interviewing his favorite character/person in the book and brought along a contest for you all to enter.  Just leave a comment with your favorite quote or motto, along with an email address where you can be reached.  The person chosen will win an eBook copy of Queer Dirty Laundry.  Must be 18 years of age or older to enter.  Contest ends 8/22.

Jason Lloyd QDL Blog Tour Banner

Queer Dirty Laundry CoverQueer Dirty Laundry Blurb:

What would you do if everything changed in the blink of an eye? Life teaches us that everything happens for a reason. Every good or bad experience, every event, shapes us into the adults we become. We are our pasts and they shape our future.

In this nonfiction coming of age mini memoir, Kevin and Jason embark on an adventure to Philadelphia to visit friends and to get into their normal hijinks. Along their journey, they confide in each other the only way best friends can; through laughter, love and pain. They share stories of coming out, first time sexual experiences and dramatic events that changed their lives forever. This hilarious and heartfelt journey through the past can only strengthen their friendship in the present.

Your best friend knows all your little secrets. They know all your dirty laundry. Can you air it all out? How dirty is your laundry?

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Interview with Knockers from Queer Dirty Laundry

Hello, I’m Jason Lloyd the author of Queer Dirty Laundry. A few weeks ago I asked fans of the book to submit questions they would like Louis Thomas Knock aka Knockers to answer. Knockers is one of my favorite characters in the book (and real life). He was delighted to take part in this. He is mentionedKnockers_20140728_164829000_iOS throughout Queer Dirty Laundry, but the audience doesn’t actually meet him until the last chapter. His chapter is a memorable one though.

You’re a character in Jason Lloyd’s new book Queer Dirty Laundry. What was your reaction when you found out you were going to be in his book? What’s it like to be written about?

I was honored to be included on such an exclusive list. I’ve been written about in the past, but that usually involved a deposition or police report. This time I didn’t need an attorney present.

In Queer Dirty Laundry, Kevin and Jason are on their way to Philadelphia and on their way they each share stories about their first time sexual experiences. What is your first time story?

My grandparents used to send me to a private summer camp growing up. When I was seven, I experimented together with this boy and girl pretty much that whole summer. That is as far as I’m going on that… ha-ha! I’ll never tell!

Jason and Kevin share some embarrassing stories in Queer Dirty Laundry. Can you tell us one about yourself?

I was fooling around with an ex in his car and the next thing we saw were those red and blue flashing lights, followed by a bright spotlight shining directly on us. We had to get dressed and get out of the car. The cops recognized my ex from his high-profile job, which made it even more embarrassing for the both of us. Lesson learned; don’t fool around in a park after dark!

Do you think people were accepting of your sexuality?

I’m very blessed to have a family that supported me and didn’t make me feel different.

How would you describe your friendship with Jason? What’s it like being friends with Jason?

Jason adds a unique dynamic to my social circle. He’s charismatic, funny, loyal and over the top! What first started out as a textual relationship turned into nights of missing underwear and a closet of four right shoes (Why am I always losing the left?). He’s famous for telling me, “Make good decisions.”

What do you most value in your friends?

What I most value in friendship is honesty, loyalty and support. (In that order.)

Do you have any hidden talents you would like to share?

I can move my eyes independently. Ha-ha, it makes me look crazy.

What’s your motto?

Life is a stage and you get only one performance. Make it a good one.

Last question, are you still missing those Burberry boxer briefs from the last chapter?

Ugh, that day! Too many Patron margaritas. I lost my underwear and dignity that day… only one returned.

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Here’s my favorite scene from Queer Dirty Laundry featuring Knockers.

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Louis Thomas Knock looks amazing. His brown hair is perfectly styled, and he is wearing the latest collection from Burberry, a fitted gray button down shirt and tapered fit dark denim. I stare at him as brown eyes catch the sunlight shining through the restaurant window, making them almost look honey in color.

“Knockers!” I yell out.

“Hello darlings.” Knockers answers back. He gives us air kisses from where he is sitting at our table and when he gets to me, he blows me a kiss as well.

“You look handsome babe,” I say.

“Well, thank you J. You know, I have a taste for luxury and luxury has a taste for me.” Knock playfully winks at me.

“I know. You’re flawlessness is made up of silicone, saline and a perfectly bleached asshole.” I say.

Jelissa and Kevin both laugh.

“Do you actually bleach your asshole?” Kevin asks.

“No.” Knockers laughs. Our server appears and asks him if he wants to order anything. “Just a blood orange margarita, I’m on a liquid diet only this month. Better make it a pitcher.” The server disappears to fetch it.

“You’re gonna regret that in the morning,” I say.

“It’s okay. I’ll just sleep until noon. Look at me, I’m a problem solver,” Knockers confirms.

“Oh and Kev, he may not bleach his asshole, but I’m pretty sure little cartoon birds appear every morning and douche it for him.” I add.

“Just like Snow White! It’s good to have help,” Knockers says.

“I would have pegged him as the Evil Queen,” Kevin adds.

“Oh, that ratchet, dried up hag? Please, I’m the fairest of them all.” Knockers looks into his reflection on his phone screen and says, “My mirror tells me so.”

***Hey gang, what is your favorite quote or motto? Leave it in the comments for a chance to win an ebook copy of my new book Queer Dirty Laundry! One person will be randomly selected from the comments.

I would like to thank Scattered Thoughts and Rogue Words for allowing me to share this interview with you. I also would like to thank the fans for submitting the questions and my wonderful publicist Joleen from Parenthetical Author Services for setting up my blog tour. If you need help promoting your work, email Joleen at joleen@parentheticalauthorservices.com.

Jason Lloyd Bio:

Jason Lloyd author picJason Lloyd is the author of hilarious m/m romance featuring an array of interesting characters. Salty Aftertaste (Ginge Publishing, 2013) was his first creative non-fiction novel. It reached Smashwords Top Best Seller list in Gay & Lesbian Fiction and was the #5 best seller in the New Adult genre on All Romance eBooks (ARe).

His second book, Queer Dirty Laundry (Ginge Publishing, 2014), is a creative non-fiction novella and is based on his popular blog by the same name. In 2011, QueerDirtyLaundry.com was nominated for The Best of Gay Philadelphia under Best Gay Website/Blog. Jason’s blog was also in the top ten numerous times on Best Male Blogs.

Jason is currently working on an m/m romance and mystery/suspense fictional novelette series called Filthy Fibbers. Filthy Fibbers is centered on five friends and the scandalous secrets they keep. The book takes place in a small Pennsylvania town called New Hope.

Jason grew up in a small town in Bucks County, Pennsylvania outside of Philadelphia. A majority of his writing takes place in Eastern Pennsylvania including Philadelphia. He currently resides in a small town in Berks County, Pennsylvania.

Social Contacts:

Email | Facebook | Twitter | Goodreads and Ask the Author | Website

Queer Dirty Laundry Buy Links:

Amazon | All Romance eBooks | Barnes and Noble | Google Play | iBooks | Smashwords

Sunday expectations , Sounds of fall in the air and the week Ahead at ScatteredThoughts

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Sunday is  upon us once more.  How quickly it seems to come around each week.  Normally I would be outside planting, weeding, enjoying the gardens and the dogs but the sounds I hear lately remind me that fall is coming and preparations need to be made.   The whites, yellows and purples associated with late summer, early fall flowers are out in full force.  The “Daisy Mae:” Daisies are hanging in there, the Black-Eyed Susans have thwarted the deer, and the purples of liriope, False Dragonhead, and Great Blue Lobelias are just starting to make their presence known.

Overhead flocks of Canada Geese and Snow geese are reforming, heading to the marshes surrounding the Bay in huge masses, reading for migration and winter.  My feeders are being emptied at an astonishing rate after piddling interest all summer long.  Some leaves have started falling, and the sunlight has that slanted, cooler look to it that proclaims that the Summer Solstice has passed and it is filtering the landscape through an autumnal lens.

The pruning shears are out, the mulch bags waiting for someone other than me to cover the beds.  The hummingbirds are still here, the feeders still full, and the offerings in the yard are getting scarcer by the day.

It also means that GRL is fast approaching in October and I hope soon to be able to make an announcement about a new reviewer here at ScatteredThoughtsandRogueWords.  I love fall.  Its every bit as beautiful to me  as Spring and Summer. In fact it may be my favorite of all the Seasons.  Brisk, clean air that puts a snap to your step as your walk and a little color in your cheeks.  I know the dogs are happier…its terrier weather for sure.

Ahhh, the sounds of change is in the air…how sweet, how promising, how wonderful!

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Now for the upcoming week ahead at Scattered Thoughts….

Monday, August 11:

  • Blue Notes continues with Shira Anthony’s Dissonance Book Tour (contest)
  • Book Blast:  Cate Ashwood’s Wholehearted Audio Book Tour (contest)

Tuesday, August 12:

  • On Tour with Rory Ni Coileain’s SoulShares Series (contest)
  • Lou Hoffman is Here with Key of Behliseth, a YA Book Release (contest)
  • Review:  Dissonance by Shira Anthony

Wednesday, August 13:

  • Review: Wicked Winds by Havan Fellows
  • Review: Out in the Cold by Lee Brazil

Thursday, August 14:

  • In the Author Spotlight: Jason Lloyd and his release, Queer Dirty Laundry (contest)
  • Review:  Devil’s Own by Susan Laine

Friday, August 15:

  • In the Author Spotlight:  Lee Brazil on Writing, In From the Cold, and More (contest)
  • Review: You Can’t Go Home Again by Michael Murphy

Saturday, August 16:

    • Review: Queer Dirty Laundry by Jason Lloyd