Rating: 2.5🌈
Off The Wall by Edie Montreux is a fantasy novel by a writer i just discovered. I always want to be positive about books by a as new to me author.
But I found myself struggling to find some good aspects of this fantasy book to highlight.
It’s not the storylines originality. The author doesn’t help herself by telling us exactly what her inspiration was when plotting her story (the movie ‘Overboard’ – “”It’s Overboard, but she’s a princess, her rescuer is gay, and she mistakes him for her brother, also gay.” Then mixed with , also in the author’s words , “Throw in a royal marriage proposal (The Princess Bride) and a royal decree on marriage “(” You must be married to a prince,” a.k.a. Aladdin), and it practically wrote itself.”
Le sigh, as they say.
The characters hold appeal. They are the strength of the book. But for every strength the author layers in, like Rye’s relationships with his family and especially his brother Trevor, a challenging dynamic that gets a believable amount of growth, there’s a equally weak and unsettling element.
Here it’s the manner in which Prince Cyril is portrayed. A “himbo prince “, a scatter brain, “lazy”, who can’t do his own work or school book training. A dreamer who can’t even remember math numbers correctly.
Are things adding up for you here?
Was Montreux truly unaware that Cyril is written as someone who’s learning disabled or challenged? That every word the other characters, including the man who’s supposedly been in love with him, who calls him lazy, are intolerant, and often ugly ?
Yes, Cyril may have had a privileged, tightly controlled upbringing but he’s , as written a sweet, open hearted person. Yet he’s being mocked for his lack of ability to understand mathematics, ability to concentrate, and other things seemingly out of his control.
Not a nice element.
The moat dragon comes and goes at will. It’s not a well developed part of this book and storyline, especially at the end where it obeys surprise commands. Really?
But aside from the characters within Rye’s family, the reader has to live with the feel and flow of a narrative overflowing with a density of details.
Need a chair? We get the type of wood, how it was made, type of lathe, two backs,spindles. The story becomes burdensome with knowledge that slows down the movement of the narrative until the pace is downright glacial.
And it’s not just slow.
There’s no energy or enormous mountains to overcome, it’s all monotonous in the feel of the narrative. There are those stories where the main characters journey is literally laid out before you. Days, weeks, months of them living together, doing chores, rehashing their history, and it works on a deeply believable, emotional level. The reader is so invested in this life with them that the slowness doesn’t bother them.
Then there’s the books where the same journey goes on as it is written above but the reader instead feels “Omg,will they just get on with it “.
Off The Wall becomes the later, a draining narrative of endless chatter about farm chores , animals, clothing, and choices. It’s all on a one low energy level sort of basis.
As said, Montreux loves to describe things . Everything is very detailed. In a book where there’s a deficit of energy to begin with, hardly any suspense or action in a plot where a Prince and a princess, a moat dragon and even a Kingdom are at risk, well , more details aren’t quite the thing that’s missing here.
There’s no battles, nary a sword fight, the villain is rarely seen and his death is swiftly done and forgotten.
This is an example of the type of narrative and detail here:
“Building their cabin proved to be enough of a challenge in the early days. It took Rye all spring to find the right wood to make the beams. Once the frame was built, Cyril helped him with the walls and the thatched roof until the cool mornings gave way to hot afternoons. They spent those in the cool stone of the outpost until it was too hot. Then, they would cool off in the nearby stream. Finally, on the first day of autumn, Rye considered their little house a home worthy of a prince. It had three rooms, like his parents’ original cottage. The sitting room, kitchen, and dining room”
The next paragraph is about how and what type of rooms the house had. What they were lined with, how many chairs, the type of chairs. Etc.
Next paragraph is all about building their bed, their dresser, etc.
On, and on. Details upon details.
Imagine pages and pages of this.
The entire book is like this.
Even their sexual activity is a manual. Just read as so non sexy.
It took everything I had to finish this.
Read the above passage. Decide if that sort of writing is your thing.
If so, this might be your book.
Buy Link:
Description:
When unrequited love sours to hate, it takes something off the wall to turn it around.
After the royal moat dragon is accused of murder, Prince Cyril immediately heads to his childhood friend-turned-nemesis’s farm to exonerate the beast. Too bad Rye still hates him and assassins want him dead.
Rye has avoided Prince Cyril since he learned his crush was futile. Now, he’s responsible for his siblings and the majority of the kingdom’s food supply. He doesn’t have time for his princely annoyance, especially when they’re trapped together with only one bed.
Instead of finding a way to return the prince to the castle, Cyril and Rye succeed only in irritating each other until another feeling rears its ugly head. Love or no, a prince can’t marry a farmer, even if their relationship is key to restoring peace in their kingdom.
Off The Wall is a male/male fantasy friends-to-enemies-to-lovers romance with comedic and cottage core elements. It has a farmer turned rescuer, a himbo prince who complicates everything, a princess with amnesia, and a playful moat dragon. There’s snark, spice, and a guaranteed happily ever after.
Content Warning: Off the Wall contains fantasy violence with swords, assassins, dungeons, and the aforementioned hungry moat dragon. It also contains farm animal battery for butchering. There is mention of a fatal plague-like disease.
Scattered Thoughts and Rogue Words 