
Rating: 2.5
Hiers is an author that’s a hit or miss writer for me. I really liked the last book I read , Twelve Days of Squidmas by H.L. Hiers . Thought the characters and plot were well developed and had depth. But one before that was a DNF and I didn’t even review it.
Shoulda Swiped Left by K. L. Hiers came much, much closer to a DNF than the previous holiday romance. I am astonished because the plot is an interesting one. But it’s how the author chooses to implement this narrative that makes the story stumble.
With mythical overtones, Hades needs a “bride” to collect his parts after he disintegrates as he must once a year. The person he “marries and disappears on, lives in splendor while going on a body part adventure.
Oh joy! Here a body part, there a body part!
For this he needs a bride. Apparently they aren’t very willing . Here comes the issues. Well more issues. The gods weren’t picky about who they had sex with so why the term bride? Anyway.
It starts with the characters. Primarily,
Joseph Abrams who’s checking out profiles on an online dating site when the absolutely most perfect man appears. I mean, this guy is PERFECT. He’s a match for our guy Joe in every aspect, and he’s drop dead gorgeous. Rich.
Joe has the situational awareness of a piece of pea gravel.
Hiers is writing another TSTL character and I’m gobsmacked. Because the author is also writing in major warnings flags for dangerous relationships in this story as though it’s a romantic oblivious joke.
Here’s a couple. They meet after exchanging some texts. No real information. Guy gives over the top gifts asap. First date. He drives, supplies the drinks. His place. Flags! That’s check mark for several dangerous activities, including sexual assaults and trafficking.
Zale Petropoulos, the gorgeous, hot mystery man, immediately gifts oblivious Joseph an extraordinarily beautiful, bejeweled gold watch. Says over the top compliments over Joe’s halfhearted attempt to say that’s too much a gift. Whisks him away in his own limo with guards. To a club where it seems no one is actually having fun, with dark atmosphere. Where he’s given several drinks. In a club that Zale owns.
Does Joe trust what tiny self preservation instincts Hiers wrote in? Nope. He’s all for sex in the back room. As I said TSTL.
If Hiers had been writing a scenario for a kidnapping by a serial killer, this entire thing would have worked. Been realistic. And Joe, naturally, would have been body number 1.
But as a romantic comedy? Absolutely not. There’s flags on the field. Let’s be wooed by someone who is literally lying about the situation, drugging you into a nonconsensual relationship, beginning with trapping you into this setup. Yes, so fun and amusing in this day and age of vulnerability and high incidence of abuse and trafficking. Only things missing are elements like ketamine in the plot line.
Which considering what the Greek gods got up to in the mythology wouldn’t be out of line if updated to current times. Oh, wait.
So no, Shoulda Swiped Left by K. L. Hiers is a miss and a mess, narratively speaking.
There’s more I could say about the story but the fact that they end up together after this, is just another example why this just doesn’t work for me.
Buy link
Blurb:
Joseph Abrams can’t believe he’s found his perfect match through online dating. Zale Petropoulos is hot, charming, and just the right amount of mysterious.
They meet for their first date and the sparks fly all the way through dinner and right through dessert.
But Zale has a confession to make and finally reveals his secret…
He’s god of the Underworld.
And Joseph is his new prince-consort.
• Publication date: January 24, 2024
• Print length: 99 pages








